Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Day 215: In It to Win It

A couple weeks ago, I accompanied JE and PB on a run. They have been running 8.5 minute miles and I am not that fast, so I rode along next to them on my bike. The trail we were on dips under roads and bridges along a waterway and comes back up at a slight incline. JE ran down these dips with surprising speed, while PB talked about how fast JE was going downhill. After observing this several times, I had a talk with PB about an analogy I use on myself.

I am at a door--there is a chain preventing me from opening the door--or perhaps a sandbag or some other obstacle. Whatever it is, it is on my side of the door, and only I can remove that obstacle. If I remove it, the door is free to open and I can walk through easily. His obstacle was thinking he couldn't run down a hill. He removed that obstacle, and was able to run down hills. He continues to improve his runs. Poor JE, PE is a running mad man...

So, Yesterday, I was in a dither about this coming tri. Three weeks and I am not feeling particularly ready. Today, I have been talking myself up, unlocking that little chain on my door.

Here is part of my conversation:
I knew going into this that I am not in it to win it; however, I may not ever win a race, I will never quit a race. I am competing against myself, no one else cares more about my performance than I do. Success is in the attitude. I know I can do this, I have done much more difficult things. Fatigue is part of getting stronger, I am tired because of my hard work--and it will pay off. Yes, my ankle hurts, but if I have to walk the race to finish it, I will walk the race (I'd rather run it, but I'd rather finish). Yes, they open the course at 10:30 to traffic--that gives me 3.5 hours to finish, plenty of time even going slow! Think of the adrenalin!

My training this morning was really tough though the physical intensity wasn't. We rode to JE's work, early, so we could run on the trail he has come to love.

It's a strange thing that for weeks and sometimes months, everything on the road is fine: no close calls, everyone paying attention, rules followed. And all in one day, all hell breaks loose*! JE and I were flying down the hill near our home. It is a steep hill and we get to speeds over 30 miles an hour. The speed limit on that road is posted at 30, so we often take the lane to avoid the line of parked cars on the street. This morning as I watched JE zoom down the hill, some lady pulled out just before him, causing him to break and swerve around her. She then rode the double yellow line next to him for the next 100 feet, and you know darn well that JE would have been toast had a car been coming in the opposite direction. Stupid stupid stupid! What was she expecting him to do, endanger himself by sliding over into the parking lane? Not cool, stupid. All I can say about my response was that she is probably very grateful that the lights were both in her favor--I hope she felt as threatened as we did.

As I pulled up to the second light, I signaled alerting traffic that I was moving into the turn lane. I could hear the bus coming, but expected the driver to respect both the red light in front of us and my out-turned arm. She only slowed in the pedestrian cross walk, zipping past me--close. It was a short-bus, and evidently she needed to be on that bus...

The third light: I got to the other side, and a woman in a giant white sedan brushed by so close, I could feel the whoosh of her mirror--she was riding the white line of the bike lane. Bitch.

Eighty percent of our ride is on trail, but, this morning rattled me. We got to JE's work and prepped for our run. It was terrible, I was weak and tired and didn't have much faith that I could keep going. I did most of a 5 mile run, but it was not easy nor pretty. When I got home, I iced and relaxed with my foot up, reading the Triathletes Bible. It was a good reminder of just what I want and how to achieve it. It put some sense into all of this.

*Yesterday, after years of cycling near dogs with no incident, three dogs tried to jump their leashes and come after me, barking and baring teeth. What the heck? Was it the new moon? Unlock pure crazy!

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